so dense? I mean, what is it that makes them treat their oldest son as though he is not doing all he can? What makes them treat their daughters as though they are just not quite good enough?
For example, my husband is a good man, albeit with old fashioned attitudes. Our daughter is 18 and fully capable of just about anything. She doesn't always know what her father is wanting her to do, though, because since she started developing as a woman, her father is sort of at a loss.
DH is looking for someone to show a heifer at the fair this summer. He has asked both of the boys, ages 17 and 14. Yes, Kelly isn't the best showman, but she has never been told exactly HOW to show, therefore, she is just learning as she goes. I inquired about showing the heifer. "He won't ask me Mom, I don't have a penis". How heartbreaking is that? I mean what is he teaching her about what she can and cannot accomplish in life?
Second example: My 17 year old son plays baseball in the spring, football in the fall. He is also extremely busy with end-of-school-year stuff, since he is on the Honors tract. Last night, he got in about 9 PM and was working on a school project, having been at a baseball game and an FFA officer interview. His father called him and wanted him to go check out some stuff in the barn, since he was working across the county. Kelly was just at the barn not two hours before, but he didn't call her. Ethan was at the barn for about an hour. Of course, the question came up: Why are you still working on homework.
Now granted, it isn't often Ethan has homework, but when he does, it is time consuming stuff. And he doesn't want any help. So he was up until about 1, finishing his project. There were issues with markers, scissors, etc. I helped as much as I could and he was still frustrated this morning. I asked DH about calling Ethan instead of Kelly. 'Kelly wouldn't understand and Ethan wasn't doing anything last night' was the response. OK, Ethan may not have been home, but he was doing stuff, just not what his father considered important. It was important to Ethan.
So anyway: I wish I had some 'learning needles' with me last night. I could probably have taught the whole softball team to knit while we waited for the baseball team to throw away the game, which they did spectacularly. I started a pair of socks (again, third times the charm) and they were fascinated.
I need to make up some learning needles this weekend. Next week, baseball and softball are away. I could have a captive group. (HE HE HE!)